Echarte Tolle writes that.  He talks about how Love works in relationships and how it means pure acceptance.  Loving somebody, means loving every part of them– the good and the bad.

But wait.  That’s exactly the issue.

Love doesn’t even see “good” and the “bad”.  It’s not about saying “I love even your shadow side”.  There is no shadow side.  Nothing is wrong, there is nothing to improve, it is all beautiful.   “Good” and “Bad” are two words are irrelevant in the light of love, like two shadows that melt away as the suns shines from right over head.

I’ve been listening to these awesome insights in a lecture by Marshall Rosenburg on non-violent communication.  He points out that the language of judgements and comparison is seeped into our language and grammar.  Words like “should” and “have to” “ought” “must”  “can’t” “suppose to” are so innocuous yet, contain this subtle metaphysics of “good” and “bad” states, that, without consciousness can undermine our best attempts at loving ourselves and others.  Our behaviours then emerge out of a vague sense duty guilty and obligation.  Love in contrast,  is motivated solely for the desire of enriching life and is enfused with the spirit of playfulness and celebration.

Yeah!  Let’s go make some art together!

 

Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing
there is a field. I will meet you there.

When the soul lies down in that grass,
the world is too full to talk about.
Ideas, language, even the phrase each other
doesn’t make any sense.

– Rumi